As a parent of four kids there is no shorter way of saying it’s rough. There are days I just want to pull my hair out, I have cried, yelled, gotten frustrated and even just needed a few minutes away from it all (with hubby there of course to help watch the kids, or during nap/bedtime). I thought I would share with you in my last Intentional Parenting post how my hubby and I have disciplined, because as parents you have to be consistent and intentional with it for it to be effective and for their safety.
I am one of those parents that allows my 4 kids to play in the front yard (un-fenced) but with my supervision and presence outside as well. Lately I noticed my 3 little ones going towards the neighbors yards or near the street so I have designated the front step as a “time away” place for them to sit when they have crossed over to a neighbors yard (with my warning of course)- Elizabeth and Xander understand for the most part that this is where they need to go and sit for a few seconds, but Max still needs my help getting there and sometimes I have to hold him. I explain to them (especially the twins why they were sitting and why they are not to go into other yards or street) Xander knows better and tries to gather the twins when they start heading for the road or neighbors yard.
(Elizabeth sitting on the front step)
When Xander hits or pushes or kicks the other children (especially Max) we brake both involved up, hold the one hurting and say “hitting hurts, (insert name) is crying that hurt him or her. Be gentle, give hugs instead, etc” and we normally prompt Xander and Nevaeh to say “sorry” but sometimes prompting isn’t needed and they will do so on their own. Sometimes Xander will give a hug after his apology:
When toys are involved and there is fighting going on then I will normally say to my younger ones “(insert name) will have the grocery cart until they get to the other side of the room, then it is your turn.” this works for Xander as he likes to know when his expected turn is. Elizabeth kind of goes with the flow, and Max has a little to no difficultly with turn taking but may have a meltdown. With Nevaeh I normally have to set a timer on the stove or cell phone with her allotted time with the item before handing it over.
If there is constant misuse of the toy then I warn of taking it away and putting it on the fridge or in the basement and will follow through if the kids can’t abide by my warning.
I could go on and on with discipline, but there must also be in place rewards and praise. For my kids that might mean a random dessert one day for being good after dinner, complimentary cookies or balloons at the grocery store, but normally they receive marbles in their marble jar (read orginial post explaining this method here).
How do you discipline and praise your children? Or what do you remember being disciplined of most as a child?
Tomorrow is the last day to enter the ABC Scripture cards giveaway and to add your own Intentional Parenting or just parenting link to the Intentional Parenting link up below.
Courtney from This Lil Light O’Mine has so graciously offered a set of ABC Scripture Cards to one of my wonderful readers. I am so excited for one of you to win these! Winner will be announced Thursday, October 9th. Make sure and enter the giveaway below!
Now it is your turn, please link up any ideas you have for being intentional with your kids. This is a place for us to encourage each other and I am excited to see what you all have to share! If you would like to be a guest host for this monthly link party, please email me at kerisnyder(at)gmail(dot)com.
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Now it is your turn to link up!!